Sticks and Stones

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me!” I yelled those words many a time at my tormentors as a child. Kids were always looking for a way to point a finger at someone and show their flaws.

“You’re a Fatso!”

“You wear dirty clothes. Doesn’t your mother ever wash.”

“You smell like your daddy. He’s a drunk!”

To escape the humiliation to any possible line of truth in those taunts, the “sticks and stones” was screamed back. And no matter how many times we said them or how loud we projected them, those words hurled at us really did hurt. We could hand them out as well at get them.

Today we are more sophisticated in our taunting. We have worked to increase our vocabulary adding softer but still destructive words to our list. And we have learned to finesse our selections to plunge deep when we use them. Yep, them’s fightin’ words for sure!

We know the words hurt and we want them to hurt. But we say them nicely so they come out as a “got cha.”

This ploy is used by everyone everywhere today. Some call it diplomacy. Some call it educated and civilized. And some use it to distort the truth. Intolerance can be made to be tolerant to some people just by choosing the right word.

I remember when homosexuals were referred to as queer. And that word used in that context is definitely hurtful. So it was replaced by a joyful, happy word: gay. See? Doesn’t that make it all better now? A queer lifestyle isn’t acceptable but a gay lifestyle is.

Our President has decided that we can’t have a war, so the term “war on terror” can’t be uttered by anyone in his administration. Someone might believe there really is a war. Albeit, there are people out there shooting and killing other human beings because they want to dominate and control them, but that isn’t a war. It is a man-made disaster. To me, a man-made disaster that results in mass killings is a war. Let’s rewrite the history books to correct this misconception. There was the American Revolution Man-made Disaster, the Civil Man-made Disaster, Spanish-American Man-made Disaster, International Man-made Disaster I and International Man-made Disaster II, the Vietnam Man-made Disaster, the Korean Man-made Disaster. We just have to stop using the word war because it is a negative term. Then people will feel better.

Did you know in schools no one can say “shut up” any more without being reprimanded or fired? No matter how much noise students make, no matter how many times they sass the teacher, no student is to ever be told to shut up. We have alternative words that mean the same thing, such as “be quiet.” Isn’t that less hurtful when you’re told to be quiet instead of to shut up? But do the students stop that noisy behavior when told to “be quiet?” Have any idea how they react when told to shut up?

Culturally we have embarked on a new era trying not to hurt anyone, probably because of the way we were scarred as children. And, yes, I agree that we shouldn’t intentionally toss around mean-spirited words to hurt others. Changing the meanings of words just doesn’t sit well with me; nor does using selected terms to avoid telling the truth.

Darn it all, that pendulum has swung too far the other way for me. A brick is a brick is a brick. And a person who kills another human being is a murderer. There are some things we just can’t take from ugly to pretty.